I have never felt as insecure in my entire life as I did when we first began our journey in youth ministry. In my mind, I had a list of expectations for myself as a StuMinWife that was daunting. The perfect StuMinWife is an amazing woman in the church who has her life all together and leads and encourages those in her care with grace and humility at all times. The perfect StuMinWife has a great relationship with her husband and bends-over-backwards, ignoring her own needs, to make him the best student ministry pastor he can be. The perfect StuMinWife has her home in order with laundry finished and dinner on the table every evening. The list from each of us could be a mile long of different pressures we feel to be the perfect StuMinWife to all people at all times. But the list of expectations is something we will never measure up to. The list is something we were never meant to have in the first place.
I have so many StuMinWives friends who count themselves as failures because they just aren’t “good enough” in some aspect on their list to make the cut as an amazing woman in ministry. I know StuMinWives who believe they aren’t extroverted enough to speak boldly in public. I have friends who are StuMinWives who believe they don’t know the Bible enough to encourage and teach students. I know some who believe they aren’t good enough to lead others because of their own personal struggles and pain. Many of these women don’t believe they can be an example to other women because their marriage and home life isn’t good enough as they struggle to make it just one more day in ministry as a mom and as a wife.